The topic of self-care or self-kindness isn’t a new one. You can’t spend more than 30 seconds on Instagram without seeing some sort of aspirational self-care quote. 

But it goes beyond that and goes much deeper than that.

In this episode, I’m joined by the incredible Jennifer Pirtle to talk about this. 

This is going to be a great episode for anyone who either feels like they’re too connected digitally and it’s impacting the amount of self-care that they are able to give themselves and those of you who identify as people-pleasers!

Listen here:

The key takeaways:

💛  Self-bullying is often the “default setting” – very common amongst entrepreneurs because we’re very focused on success and results. When this is your default setting, it’s very hard to see that you aren’t being kind to yourself.

💛  Self-kindness and self-compassion are woven throughout your day and go much further than lighting a few candles and having a bath. It’s about how you talk to yourself.

💛  When you’re feeling stressed and anxious, ask yourself “what would nourish me right now?” See what comes up and follow what you need. It might be to take a 20-minute nap or to go for a walk etc. But when we’re in the midst of deadlines we might be able to identify what we need but not actually follow through on it. The key is to identify what would nourish you and then to actually go and do that thing. The work and the emails aren’t going anywhere, they will still be there when you get back but what can change is that way you deal with those things.

💛  For people-pleasers it can feel like prioritising yourself means de-prioritising other people. If you’re used to doing everything for everyone, test out not doing that and see what happens! You can make those shifts yourself and see how the people around you react. A lot of it comes down to the intention behind your actions too. Slow down and pause to take a breath as you’re doing things and try to see what your intentions are behind your actions.

💛  Bring awareness to how you feel and where you feel things in your body. Does your chest feel tight? Is there a fluttering in your stomach? Once you start to notice these things you can really think about where you are coming from with your actions. Are you doing things because you feel like you “should” be doing them rather than because they are the right things to do for you?

💛  Self-care is supposed to be fun. We can start to stray away from that by getting into a habit of forcing self-care. Anything can be a meditation! You don’t have to be sat on a cushion on the floor in silence. It doesn’t have to be a formal practice that you tick off on a list – that’s not self-kindness at all. Instead, practice things that you resonate with. It’s about having an understanding of what brings you ease and joy.

Listen to this episode here.

The links + stuff:

Your challenge:

Jot down 5-10 things that really do bring you joy and a sense of ease. Pin your list on your wall so you can choose something to nourish yourself with when you need to.

Don’t forget to share your intentions and takeaways with me on Instagram!

Listen here:

If you never want to miss another episode, subscribe to the show here.


If you’re a loyal listener of Your Biz, Your Rules THANK YOU! Having you tune in each week is such an honour. If you’ve been enjoying the show, I’d love to hear your thoughts…

To leave a review…

  • Head here to iTunes.
  • Click “view in iTunes”
  • (Make sure you’ve hit “subscribe”)
  • Click “Ratings & Reviews”
  • Leave me your (honest) feedback