If you follow me on Instagram, you’ll know that recently I’ve been challenging myself to read one chapter of a business book every single day. I could yammer on about the benefits of this little project forever, but today I want to talk about one of the books I’ve managed to make my way through…
You are a badass: How to stop doubting your greatness and start living an awesome life by Jen Sincero, to be specific. (Grab a copy here.)
This is one of those books that is just supremely quotable. Jen is FUNNY AS. Her wit is sharp even though her topic is woo. And while at its core this book is about life (and making it better) I couldn’t help but relate each of her points to the world of online business. I don’t know if this is because I’m too scared to focus on my own inner workings or because I’m so immersed in all things business at the moment… perhaps a little of both (but that’s a topic for another day).
If you see my copy of this book, it has a whole rainbow of post-its sticking out of every other page. I couldn’t help but make notes while I read; so much of what she was saying made sense to my world – I thought it would be fun to share all of these insights with you so that you too can see just what it takes to be a badass at online business.
Without further ado…
Wanting can be done sitting on the couch with a bong in your hand and a travel magazine in your lap.
Deciding means jumping in all the way, doing whatever it takes, and going after your dreams with the tenacity of a dateless cheerleader a week before prom night.
I mean, HOW TRUE IS THIS?! I see so, so many business owners lay down these big impressive goals and then [insert indefinite pause].
Dreaming about something does not make it real. Even if you buy into all the manifestation, law of attraction spirit-talk, you have to be willing to do the work if you want the results.
It never ceases to amaze me the precious time we spend chasing the squirrels around our brains, playing out our dramas, worrying about unwanted facial hair, seeking adoration, justifying our actions, complaining about slow Internet connections, dissecting the lives of idiots, when we are sitting in the middle of a full-blown miracle that is happening right here, right now.
Nowhere is this crazy brain more apparent than in the online business community.
Seriously. Nobody gets distracted by the (anally retentive) busy work more than I do. Big deadline coming up? Well, today is the day I must change every single one of my blog post images. Tax return today? #sorrynotsorry but today is actually the day I must rename and alphabetise all photos taken/downloads downloaded/Evernote notes noted.
We focus on the minutiae of all this nonsense when really we need to be looking at that big picture, taking note of the tasks that will actually move us forward and celebrating the wins that we dismiss as “nothing”.
You are responsible for what you say and do. You are not responsible for whether or not people freak out about it.
When it comes to creating online content, I BEG OF YOU, use your voice. Have an opinion. Share it. Engage in real discussions with real people. Online, there is always someone who will be offended. It’s an international past-time at this point. Don’t let the fear of what some anonymous weirdo might think stop you from doing you.
I will grant you that the sadist who installed read receipts on all of our Messenger apps makes it difficult to be empowered and carefree 100% of the time* but we can try.
*I sent you that message 43 minutes ago. I can see that you read it 29 minutes ago. Why haven’t you responded yet? WHY DO YOU HATE ME?
Your brain is your bitch. […] I think, therefore, I can create awesomeness.
Literally, every person out there is able to come up with ideas. And every person that is able to come up with ideas, is able to turn those ideas into reality.
Pretty much whenever you use the word “can’t”, it’s your brain trying to sabotage you. It’s a pink, spongy organ trying to protect you from doing anything different to whatever you’re doing right now. Because different is dangerous.
But different is also where innovation, insight, and inspiration are born. And we need more of those in the world.
It’s not your fault that you’re fucked up. It’s your fault if you stay fucked up.
If I could hunt down Jen Sincero and give her a high five (without getting arrested) this would be why. How often do you hear excuses (or tell yourself excuses) about why something can’t be done?
I wasn’t raised that way. That’s not how we do things. I never learned how to do that. I’m not very good at writing/numbers/project management. Everyone hates me. I’m crap with money. The bank is out to get me. My mum/dad/ex-guinea pig doesn’t love me. Nobody will ever accept what I do. I don’t get the respect I deserve. I’m scared of getting visible. I’m scared of getting honest.
Time for some real talk… YOU are in charge of YOU. Yes, you might have grown up a certain way. You might have inherited a barge-full of issues… but so what? What are you going to do about it? Sit there sulking or make an effort to change?
(For more on this, seek out the wonderful Elizabeth Gilbert.)
We are all perfect in our own, magnificent, fucked-up ways. Laugh at yourself. Love yourself and others. Rejoice in the cosmic ridiculousness.
This is just good solid advice. Don’t beat yourself up for not being the effervescent, yacht-straddling life coach or the waif-like smoothie-snorting blogger. Celebrate your random, ridiculous quirks… and offer the same courtesy to those who surround you.
Because FYI, that’s how you attract the right people to your online business. #justsaying
Never apologize for who you are. It lets the whole world down.
I work with so many brilliant people, who do so many brilliant things, but I so rarely see anyone being out-and-out PROUD of their accomplishments. We feel like we’re bragging, or being arrogant, or being salesy or sleazy or… etc, etc.
While I will never be the kind of person who leads with all of the life boxes I’ve ticked (and I will probably never be friends with anyone that does), it is so so important for you to stop hiding your sparkle.
Stop undermining what you say by using weak language. It’s like you’re apologising before you even do anything. (Read this for more on the topic.)
If you want to live a life you’ve never lived, you have to do things you’ve never done.
Can I hear a big DUH?
There’s a saying that the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over while expecting different results. And l even if that doesn’t make you (medically) insane, it does not make you an arse-kicker, does it?
Like I said at the start… setting those big hairy goals is not enough. You have to be willing to get in on the action. That will involve doing things that are new and weird. That will involve learning stuff, testing stuff out, scrapping stuff and refining your approach. This is what we call progress, my friend.
The only failure is quitting. Everything else is just gathering information.
It is really, really hard to reframe your view of failure. I mean, let’s be real, if something doesn’t go to plan, we call it a failure. Because that’s what it is.
BUT, and this is a big but, hence the capitals, failure is not necessarily a bad thing. When we fail at something, we get closer to figuring out what will work for us. We get to experience happy accidents. We get to learn big lessons. We get a whole load of fodder for future articles and Instagram posts (No? Just me then.)
Don’t despair if things don’t go your way. Your next move is not your final move.
So, are you a badass at online business?
If you’re going to commit to implementing one of these tips or if you have your own nugget of business advice to share, I would love to hear from you – leave me a comment below!
